The Blessing of a Civil Union: Agape Love in Action

For any of you doubters out there, let me assure you that presiding at the Blessing of a Civil Union is some of the best evangelism work I have been part of in a long time. So many folks in the LGBT community have been taught, and have seen in action, horrible distortions of what the gospel of Jesus Christ truly is. What a privilege to have the opportunity to present a (hopefully) clearer image of our Lord Jesus. May he take these efforts and bless them for the sake of the Kingdom.

A Homily for the Blessing of the Civil Union of Joe Ryan and Dennis Gerst 6/13/2010, offered by Nathan Ferrell at Church of the Holy Spirit in Bellmawr, NJ

Texts: Colossians 3:12-17; Psalm 67; Matthew 7:21, 24-29

It is a privilege and an honor to stand here today as a witness to this relationship between Dennis and Joe, which has in reality already stood the test of time.

Our task here today is not to create something new, but rather to give our witness to what God has already done in the lives of these two, to give them our blessing, and to ask for God’s continued blessing upon them.

But I am certain that most of the heavy lifting, the hard work of creating relationships that last, has already been done by Joe and Dennis. For no relationship can last if the partners are not willing or able to do the things that we have just heard spoken about in these scriptures: to be patient with one another, to forgive one another, to have compassion on one another, to encourage the growth and well-being of one another.

After all, this is what Jesus teaches us in his parable of the house that is built on the solid rock. That kind of house is a relationship where compassion and kindness and humility and patience are put into practice by intention and commitment.

We here in the Church have always proclaimed that the truth which we just sang about, that God is love. After all, the sole reason for our existence as a community is our conviction that, in the person of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, God has intervened in history out of compassionate love for the world.

But making that affirmation open us up to a lot of criticism, because many people seem to think that we imagine this loving God to be some sort of cream puff in the sky, the great big Sugar Daddy who gives us whatever we want and will never say ‘no’ to us.

But, in fact, we do mean something very specific when we in the Church use that word “love”. We are definitely NOT intending the same meaning as the singers of pop music. Because of my young girls, I am forced to listen way too much to pop song, and recently it has been the song by Ke$ha, “Your love, your love, your love is my drug.”

In truth, we understand that there is no real love with accountability. This love of God we call agape from the ancient Greek, and this agape love is one that is passionately committed to the growth and well-being of the other. When we frail humans are inclined to self-destruct, God intervenes with compassionate love, not giving us what we want, but providing what we need to grow and become who we are created in essence to be.

This agape love is at the center of every committed, accountable Christian union of two souls. At its best, this kind of Christ-centered relationship provides the ideal environment in which we can grow and develop to our fullest potential. This is living on the foundation of solid rock, rooted and grounded in a love that is strong enough to weather the storms that life inevitably brings our way, and to continue on with compassion and patience.

So, thank you, you two, for already giving us an example of what this kind of commitment looks like in practice. And may God give you both grace to carry on in this way for many more years to come. Amen.